May 22, 2024

Well, time goes fast. It’s already June 29…and apparently, I’m supposed to be back in Manila by July.

But I’m not complaining.

I feel at peace with myself. I don’t know why, but I guess it’s because of the fact that I get to spend a lot of quality time with my loved ones.

It’s the first time in many years that our family comes together; after all, the vacation periods don’t synchronize with each other.

That’s why I am spending a lot of time with my elder siblings and their children. The nitty-gritty of life doesn’t allow me to get that much time.

It seems that when one actually enjoys something, time does indeed go fast.

Just as I consider 2017 to be my most frustrating year ever, 2018 seems to be fair game in comparison.

I never expected my poetry to be published, or actually get the chance to submit a manuscript to a publishing house.

Besides, I am about to get my Master’s Degree, though I wonder how in the world I would be able to handle 24 teaching periods, a mind-draining postgraduate degree that focuses on analyzing and then producing something original out of it…and the much-needed Licensure Examinations for Teachers.

But then, if I can endure the little things, I can also endure the big ones and get on top!

I do hope that 2018 ends on a high note for me.

As for my blog, I have been writing these stuff since 2009.

No one read it back then, apart from my English teacher who told me never to give up.

Those years were hard, to be honest. I can tell you with certainty that I go to another computer to read my blog and appease my ego. Hahahaha, so weird, right?

But then, nowadays, quite a number of people consider my blog to be “required” or “regular” or “light” reading. All of them work for me and I am happy about that fact!

Even though only a few people read my literary stuff, I still feel happy about the state of my blog overall!

I think that the challenge for me is to be able to become more disciplined about my writing schedule and to have a more consistent writing quality.

If I can do these things without losing my sanity and without selling a lot of the “social life” (read: when you write, you actually surrender a lot of that), then that’s a clear victory for me.

I don’t know why, but I want to get a writing award, not to show off to other people, but to prove to myself that I can actually reach a certain amount of quality at my best.

Well, if anything, I want to be able to publish a book and get people to buy it so that I could consider myself as an author already. Hahaha!

Why is struggle so hard?

Why is it so enticing to actually give up on life?

Why is the fruit of struggle placed far away?

Why does it seem that there are times when the light at the end of the tunnel is unseen?

Sometimes, these thoughts keep me awake at night.

After all, it’s a necessity for people to reflect on the choices they make in order to synthesize new ones, right?

Sometimes, I don’t have control over my emotions.

I let my emotions get over me, to be frank about it.

I don’t know if controlling them is the best way to go, but I do know that I should not show extreme emotions in the workplace. Luckily, I was able to succeed in that regard last year! Yay!

Time is fast.

I just hope that I can do something meaningful with the time that I have!

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